How to Control Anger Before It Controls You


To control your anger, first, recognize the source of your emotion. For example, you may be feeling angry about a child’s messy room, your partner’s late dinners, or your habit of eating alone. Remember that anger will not solve the problem, whatever the source of your anger. Instead, use it to make a change that will benefit you and your loved ones.

Self-monitoring reduces the tendency to operate on autopilot.

Several different self-monitoring techniques work for controlling anger. Bornstein, P.H., developed and published a number of them. The process entails having the client write down information relating to the triggers that cause anger, the circumstances that led to the offense, and the coping responses that a person uses to control anger. Then, by recording the information, the client can formulate hypotheses that will help them better control their anger.

Self-monitoring forms also allow for additional data collection. They are routinely used in cognitive behavioral therapy and contribute to a wide range of evidence-based treatments. This method includes recording and discrimination. In addition, there are online anger management courses that reduce an individual operation on autopilot to control their anger.


According to Nathaniel Thom, a stress physiologist, exercise has a robust prophylactic effect. Therefore, it can help you express your anger and redirect your focus. Many people use exercise to relieve stress and avert feelings of anger. Moreover, a good routine involves varying movement challenges that require you to concentrate and maintain physical health. Hence, exercise can help control anger before it controls you.

Another exercise that can help control anger before it controls you is boxing. The box is practical stress relief; it is also a high-intensity workout. If you can’t find someone who enjoys boxing, you could try an online community for young people. RIt offers many resources and strategies to manage anger. They’ll also give you access to a database of anger management techniques.


One of the best ways to control your anger is to relax before speaking. This will allow your body and mind to relax, creating a better balance. Besides, curiosity is a powerful tool in regulating your emotions and thoughts. When curious, you’re more likely to make better decisions and act with more control. So, relax before you speak and make the best decision for yourself.

First, learn to breathe correctly. When we become angry, our breaths become shallow and fast. So instead, take slow, deliberate breaths and exhale slowly through the mouth. Another helpful technique is exercise, which gets our limbs pumping. Another technique that can help you relax is progressive muscle relaxation, which gradually tenses and relax different muscle groups. Doing these exercises regularly can help you control your anger before it controls you.

Talking to a mental health specialist

There are ways to manage your anger before it becomes a problem. Instead of blaming others for causing the upset, try focusing your anger on solving the problem. For example, if your child has a messy room, you might want to direct your anger at your partner for leaving the dinner table a few minutes late and not being there for your child. You can also use anger to get back at your partner or vent your frustration at a third party who is innocent.

If you notice that you are angry often, talk to a mental health specialist to get some advice on how to handle it better. Anger can mask other feelings, such as insecurity, shame, vulnerability, and anxiety. By addressing these issues before they become an issue, you can take the appropriate action to overcome them. Depending on your specific problem, your therapist may also prescribe medication, which can help you deal with the psychological issues causing your anger.

Expressing anger appropriately

The effects of uncontrolled anger are numerous. Anger can affect your relationships, body, and mind. Learn to recognize the warning signs of irritation to deal with them appropriately. Keeping calm while feeling angry is an excellent first step toward avoiding further consequences. If you feel irritated or frustrated, try breathing deeply and slowly. If you can, find a way to walk away from the situation until you have cooled down.

Identify what triggers your anger. This is important because you can work to change those thoughts and behaviors that make you feel angry. Typically, anger is triggered by a specific problem, situation, or grievance. If you frequently experience these triggers, it’s essential to identify them and learn from them. It’s also important to remember that you’re allowed to feel angry, but it doesn’t mean you should let it control you.

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