My Journey to Becoming More Approachable


Asking More Questions and Making Fewer Personal Statements

As much as I like to talk about myself, focusing too much on personal accomplishments has actually made me less likable. After some serious soul-searching, I’ve realized that it’s important to ask more questions than I answer.

The wonderful truth about turning your attention outward is that it allows you to meet truly incredible people who, in the long run, will be comfortable around you. Few things feel as great as knowing someone else is taking a genuine interest in your life; keeping this in mind is absolutely integral for healthy social growth!

Traveling and Surrounding Myself with New People

It can be tiring, if not boring, to stay in the same places with same people. This is why I’ve decided to do more traveling. Broadening your cultural horizons can be extremely fun and will give you a host of new stories to tell! There is nothing quite as instructive, or rewarding, as seeing the world and living through fresh experiences.

This isn’t to say that I no longer hang out with my older friends—I still see them frequently—but ever since I began traveling, my social skills have sharpened, and in some ways, I feel as though I’ve outgrown my closest buddies. Exploring new cultures has, after all, taught me so much about the world and the incredible people who inhabit it!

Looking Better Overall

About a year ago, I decided to overhaul my wardrobe. Looking better is one of the keys to becoming more approachable; what we wear and how we look impacts how others perceive us. I switched things up by buying finer clothing and an array of male grooming products. I also underwent a mini facelift, because as I’ve aged, my skin has started to droop and wrinkle. In the six months since my surgery, people have told me how young and vibrant I look, and I don’t even have to say that I’ve had any work done, since the results look so natural! My sense of confidence has skyrocketed, and I’m so grateful that people are more willing to approach me.

Regularly Exercising for a Healthy Glow

Looking better doesn’t stop at my face! I’ve also switched up my diet and exercise routines. Now, I eat more fruits and vegetables, and work out five times per week. I’ve lost a good amount of weight and haven’t felt more comfortable in my own body in years!

To a degree, we are all guilty of judging other people on the basis of their appearance, and I’m unfortunately no exception. This is why it’s so exciting to improve every possible aspect of my lifestyle—other people will be that much more likely to admire me! 

Assessing My Strengths and Weaknesses

I’ve never liked admitting weakness, but over the years, I’ve realized that facing my deficits, and accepting them, is the first step to gaining new strengths. I wouldn’t have become more approachable if I hadn’t first been honest with myself about the things I lack!

In order to transform my weaknesses into strengths, I bought a journal and wrote down everything that I wanted to work on, then made steady improvements day by day. I considered even the smallest strides a victory, and slowly conquered issues that I thought would be impossible to fix. Self-awareness is fundamental to making lasting changes!

Smiling and Making Eye Contact

Smiling at other people, and making consistent eye contact, is easier said than done! I, for one, had fallen into the habit of looking away as I spoke, especially in high-pressure situations. So, I decided to make a concerted effort to do the opposite.

At first, my smile looked and felt forced—it takes practice to make it natural! To train myself, I looked in the mirror and rehearsed facial expressions, and also consulted a close friend, who made the process easier. Now, people tell me that my smile is the brightest in the room!

Given all of this advice, keep in mind that consistency is what really pays off. Don’t give up until you’re the most energetic, approachable person you know! 

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